Love is...

Have you ever wondered if the person you like, or are dating is really the one you are supposed to be with? I know so many people who get into relationships, just for the sake of being in a relationship. But, that’s not how relationships should be. A lot of people are settling. Settling for less than what God has for them. It breaks my heart to hear my friends say they are with someone because “they give me attention” or “I don’t think anyone else will love me”. They are giving up hope for the man or woman God has for them. They are settling for what’s convenient and easy, someone that they can have right now. Because we are human, we want to be able to control our destiny. We would rather be in a relationship with someone we shouldn’t be with, than have faith that God has someone else out there for us.  I’m not going to lie, it’s so hard to just have faith that God knows what He is doing.  But, He does! Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the lord, plans to prosper you, not to harm you.”  I am not, in anyway, an expert on relationships, but God is. I decided to spend some time today really studying what the Bible says about relationships. While your reading this blog post, keep in mind the person you are with, or the person your interested in. Match them, and the relationship, up to what God says. If your relationship, or the person you like, is missing a lot of the qualities, you may want to reevaluate whether that is the person God wants you to be with.  Of course, no one is perfect, so that doesn’t mean if the person misses like three qualities you have banish them from your heart. No no, you wont find a perfect person, but if they are missing most of the qualities, thennnn you may want to reevaluate.

Okay, so Love! What is love? Isn’t the point of a relationship, to fall in love? well…Its like..99% love, the other 1% is whether the person surprises you with a grande iced caramel macchiato….Right? Yeah I’m pretty sure that’s right.. anyway, what is love? Here are some things that God tells us is love in the Bible. Love is…

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

• ·     patient- (it isn’t rushed, love is a natural thing that develops on its own.)
• ·     kind (see how the person you like treats other people)
• ·     doesn’t envy or boast (meaning- they are content with what they have, not always desiring what other people have, and don’t think they are the most amazing person on this planet. You don’t want someone that’s going to put themselves above all else.)
• ·     Not arrogant or rude (you don’t want someone that’s going to be rude to you in a relationship. It goes back to “love is kind”. If the person is always rude to you, are they showing love?)
• ·     It doesn’t insist on its own way (which means not letting you have any input, pretty much saying “We’re going to do what I want to do.”
• ·     Not irritable or resentful ( when someone gets annoyed really easily, its almost like you have to walk on egg shells around them. That’s not fair to you in a relationship. You should be able to be yourself, and the person should love you for that.)
• ·     Does not rejoice at wrong doing, but rejoices with the truth. (this pretty much means, for example: if you were to lie to someone, your special someone should be encouraging you to make it right and tell the truth, not rejoicing at the fact that you lied.)
• ·     Love bears all things (through thick and thin)
• ·     Believes all things (believes in the relationship, and trusts the other person, because when you love someone you won't lie to them. You can’t build a relationship on lies.)
• ·     Hopes all things. (They should have a desire for a future with you, if they can’t see a future with you, why are you together? )
• ·     Endures all things (Ah, I love this one. It means that no matter what struggles you go through, the person you are supposed to be with will be with you through it all. Because love endures all things. And the person you are supposed to be with will know that your worth it.)

2 Timothy 2:22

• ·     They should pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace.

2 Corinthians 6:14

• ·     “do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” (Okay, I know that it may have upset a few people that I put that in here. But it’s in the Bible, and nothing in the Bible is false. If you think about it, it really makes sense, though. As Christians, we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, telling us what is right and wrong. An unbeliever doesn’t have that conviction that we do. Something that to us feels wrong, might feel completely right to them. Also, they won't be able to truly relate to what we are going through. As Christians, we struggle to always do the right thing, and be a person that God is proud of. Unbelievers aren’t living by our rule book (the Bible), they are living by the rules of the world. Hence the “unequally yoked” part.  You should be with someone that running for God as fast as, or faster than you are. That should attract you to them.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

• ·     “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!” (be with a person who lifts you up when you fall, not someone that will leave you on the ground. )

Okay, I guess I’ll stop here so I don’t make this a million years long, but I could honestly go on for a while. I just want to leave off with this. Don’t settle because you are scared that God isn’t going to come through for you. He ALWAYS comes through. That is the point of faith. We don’t know the future, and we don’t know who we are going to end up with, but God knows. If we are supposed to be with someone, God has that person specially made for us. The most amazing person, hand crafted by God to perfectly fit with us, Like a puzzle piece. We just have to trust Him, and remember that He always knows what He’s doing. Well I guess i'll get off my soap box now. *drops mic* 

Until next time <3

~Tory

The Proof of a Just and Loving God.

Do you ever wonder if God really is a just and loving God? And, like many, you want proof? There are SO many Biblical facts to prove that our God is a just and loving God.  I'll start with Isaiah 61:8, “For I, the LORD, love justice, I hate robbery in the burnt offering; And I will faithfully give them their recompense And make an everlasting covenant with them”. God very clearly calls Himself just. The Bible is all truth, there are no lies in the Bible, and therefore, it must be true! One of the many occasions where He proves His justness is in Genesis. He told Adam and Eve that they could eat from all the trees in the garden except one. If they ate from that one, they would surly die. Adam and Eve were tricked, by a serpent, into thinking they would be like God if they ate from the forbidden tree. Unfortunately they both fell into temptation and God had to punish them. He banished them from the garden and they eventually died like God said they would. Their sin brought death into the world. God doesn’t want to punish His children, but He is a just God. He always does what is right, even if it is punishing the children that He loves.

God’s love for us is written everywhere in the Bible! He loves us so much that he sent His only son to die for us on the cross! Can you imagine that love?  A love so deep that He would take His son from heaven and put him on earth to be torture, ridiculed, and murdered in order for us to be able to have fellowship with Him? I can only imagine how it pained God to see His son suffer. There are so many verses proving just how loving our God truly is!

·      Job 5:11: "He sets on high those who are lowly, and those who mourn are lifted to safety."

·      Isaiah 41:10: "Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you, yes, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."

·      Philippians 4:6: "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with gratitude, make your requests known to God."

·      John 3:16 - For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

·      Psalm 86:15 - But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.

Until the next time God lays something on my heart!

~Tory.

When Homesickness Gets Complicated.

Hey there! So, it’s currently 11:10 PM, and I can’t sleep. Like at all. So I thought I’d just write about something that’s been on my mind lately. For some reason, I’ve felt rather homesick lately. This homesickness is really complicated, seeing as I’m actually currently at home in my own bed. It’s not that kind of homesickness. It’s not really the home I miss; it’s more of the feelings. But don’t get me wrong, I miss everything else too. Like, waking up in the morning to it being really dark and gloomy outside. I know that sounds super depressing, but I adore it. I also miss coming downstairs first thing in the morning (with the smell of wood burning in the fire place) and devouring a croissant while enjoying my glass of cactus juice. If you just gagged in your mouth, don’t, because it’s seriously the best thing ever!  But my homesickness isn’t just missing home, it’s missing a feeling, a place, a memory, a smell.

When I was 11, My parents took our family on a road trip back to Hungary(Second home). Of course I was excited. I had all these memories of our house and all the things we did. I thought it was going to be the best thing ever to see our old house again! But when we arrived, we realized the owners hadn’t kept it up well. The big gates that once sheltered our home (which I felt like made our house a fortress) were now overran by ivy to the point where it was hard to even see through it. Our beautiful house was small, and nothing like I had remembered. As the years have gone by, It’s hard to remember our fortress. The one I recalled as a child. Now I can only remember how awful it looked the last time I saw it.

I am normally homesick for Czech (third home), because I do feel like that is my home. But like I said, this homesickness isn’t really missing a home. It’s more like, missing a time in space that can never be brought back and I can never return to it. It’s maybe also a bit of fear too. That I’m scared to ever return. I have these perfect, magical, memories of growing up, pretty much in a fairy tale land. And just like my fortress in Hungary was a major disappointment, I’m scared to risk ruining the memories I have if I were to return. A fairy tale land is literally how I remember it. With the beautiful river by our house, castles ten minutes away, renaissance festivals, the smell of Czech food in the streets, cobblestone roads, people eating dinner outside, its all a part of me, and it made me who I am today. Now don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t ever trade my life for anything. I am so thankful that God gave me the life I have. But every lifestyle has a set of completely different struggles. I don’t know if any of this made sense at all. I mean it is like midnight now. I could just be talking, I tend to do that late at night.. But I have a lot of friends that go on mission’s trips and talk about being homesick. As in they miss the house they grew up in their whole life, and the people they’ve known since forever. Well, I figured why not share about the side that moves around a lot. It’s kind of a complicated thing to explain. But, I know a lot of third culture kids that feel the same way, but don’t really know how to explain it to other people. So, this is me kind of giving you a little peek of what TCK’s (third culture kids) or MK’s (missionary kids) go through.

Anyway, those are kind of my thoughts today.

Until my next late night rant!

~Tory <3

Lean on God, not your own understanding.

A lot has changed in my life while I’ve been in Ethiopia. For the past three months, I have been really praying about what God wants me to do with my life. I thought I was doing everything right, but I felt like something was off. Like something wasn’t quite right. So I prayed that God would give me direction in my life, and that He would show me what He wants me to do. I also prayed that it would be really obvious. I realized that sometimes I get so caught up in trying to do everything myself, that I miss out on God’s plans. For those who know me, I like to have a plan. Up until a week ago, I was pretty set on my 10 year plan. (I know I’m a bit of a freak) But I like organization. I like knowing what I’m going to do and when I’m going to do it. The truth is…I haven’t had a whole lot of control in my life. I’v moved around three countries, three languages, three cultures, and never had a choice in the matter. I don’t know, maybe that’s why I like to plan my own life. But, what I never realized…Was that no matter how amazing my day dreams about my future life are, God’s plan is so much more amazing! I know that God has a better plan, and I know that He does everything for the better, but my sinful nature is inpatient. I find myself trying to “get by” with my own plans just because I am unsure or maybe scared of where God’s plans will take me. I found out a week ago that Liberty housing filled up and they closed admissions. Before I could register. Yup, that means I wont be going to Liberty this fall.  I’ve always anticipated going to Liberty, I knew who I wanted to room with, (we had been planning this for two years) and I knew what I was going to study…Graphic design…..Yes..I know..Your probably making a face right now and going “why would Tory go into graphic design, that’s completely not her.” You see, you’re actually quite right. I think I was going into graphic design because I wanted to do something. Anything. I was going to go to college. I was going to study something. I didn’t care what It was, but that was my plan and I wasn’t going to change it. Well, God did. I told him to make it clear to me what He wanted me to do. Well, He gave me an answer. Even if it wasn’t the one I wanted…there were a lot of things that started to make me think about my life on this trip to Ethiopia. Everything we did was never ever on time. Everything was extremely late or extremely early. That made me realize that I need to just stop trying to organize everything and control everything in my life, and just give the reigns over to God. Because He can do such a better job with my life than I ever can. I also realized that maybe with the graphic design major, I was just wanting to make a decision. Instead of waiting till God led me to something, I just wanted to do it all myself. Right now! God wants us to be patient, to trust Him, and trust that everything He does is for the best. So, maybe I’m not going straight off to Liberty..But there must be a reason why God wants me to stay home for a little bit longer.  I just need to remember to keep in mind that He has my whole life under control, and all I have to do is trust Him.

Until my next life adventure,

Tory. <3

Adventures in the Philippines!

Hey There!

 Today I am in Manila, Philippines! Before I came, I thought it would be… maybe like India. No no … it is definitely its own country. Unique in every possible way, it is absolutely gorgeous here. I woke up around 4 am this morning, I know that sounds awful but I got to do my devotions and watch the sunrise, so it all worked out .J

The Filipino culture is incredibly beautiful. I spent my first day here with the pastor of the church that we are working with and his wife. They took me to a beach 2 hours away. They were so sweet! They wanted to make sure I got every possible Filipino experience that I could. I am so happy they felt that way, because I want to experience it all!

 They taught me how to properly eat a mango….

How to drink and eat a coconut…..

We also had Filipino food on the beach! SOOO much better than your American sandwich and chips picnic <3

Speaking of Filipino food…. I love it so much! I could eat rice three times a day for the rest of my life, I really could!

Like I said before, the Filipino culture is so beautiful. They live quite simply, depending on where you are. Manila is the Capital city in the Philippines with around 12 million people, so it is rather developed. Before I came, I had two ideas in my head of what Manila would be like. I thought it would be either very poor with slums, or it would be (since it is a city) very industrialized! Well, it’s both. It’s so unique in that it does have slums, but right next to the slums will be a Dunkin Donuts or Chilli’s. I feel like there is more American chain restaurants here than there is in an hour radius around where I live back home. I also have had more Starbucks here than I have had in the past year in America! 

Shopping! Yes, I love shopping. Shopping in the Philippines was a little different than American shopping though…Walking through the isles and going through all the vendors, each person would call out, Barbie doll! MAM! Barbie doll! (Actually, I’m going to miss being called Barbie Doll J) Each vendor would grab my arm or try and lure me into their little shop( I know that it’s only because I’m American and they think I’m rich), but It was a little overwhelming. All of the grabbing and everyone trying to get my attention, it kind of made me want to be invisible. I had three incredible ladies with me though: Ruth, Binky, and the Pastors wife!  (My body guards)  They helped me get all the good deals, and haggle down the prices! I am an awful haggler on my own!

I have been LOVING my time here! It’s Friday, and I feel like my time is running out! I don’t want to go home yet!!  I absolutely adore the people I have gotten to know and spend time with so far! The stories shall continue! As I continue making memories, I will continue writing about them!

Well, until next time!

~Tory B. 

Just be you.

       Ever since I was little, I've always been a really sensitive person. Every word, every facial expression, every hand gesture, had 3 million meanings. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, but it’s hard to say it’s always a good thing.  I can’t help who I am. Just like everyone else, I sometimes wish I could be another person. Maybe someone that can stand up to people, or someone that didn't care so much about holding on to friendships that are hurting more than helping. I struggled with self-acceptance for a really long time. Up until about 2 years ago, I was pretty much doing everything I could to be exactly who people wanted me to be. I thought that if I could make everyone in the world happy, that it would make me happy too. That’s not really how it works. Though I had a lot of friends, I wasn't happy. The fact that I felt like I had to continue being the person they expected me to be, made me feel like I was living a double life. Like no one knew the real me. I kept telling myself: “well I can’t turn back now” or “what if they don’t like who I really am?”. Well…. God has an interesting way of changing a heart. God decided that there needed to be a change in my life. I think He knew that I wasn't going to do it on my own. Or that I didn't want to anyway.

 Sometimes we refuse to walk on the water, because the world tells us we will fall. Instead of trusting God, we trust the world. The world told me that the only way to have all the friends and be popular was to be someone else. But that’s not true at all. See, that change in my life, was moving to Georgia. Though I was completely against it at the time, I was completely unaware of why God wanted me here. Now, I am quite certain it was so that I could find myself. The first year of moving here, was extremely difficult. I can count on one hand how many friends I had. The time alone, actually benefited me. I started doing my devotions every day and spending time with God regularly.  The best friend that I could ever have is God. He will never leave me or forsake me (Deuteronomy 31:6). I needed that year, when I only had a few friends, to draw me closer to God. I think that God wanted me to be confident in who I am, and who I am in Him, before making more friends. He took everything that I loved in Pennsylvania, because He loves me and because he knows what’s best for me. This past year, God has blessed me with so many incredible people. I've made better friends this year than I have in my entire life.  But, I did learn some things last year…

1.    God created me who I am. No one can reach happiness through trying to be who they’re not.

2.    Your “true friends” will ALWAYS be there for you. If they’re not, then they are not true friends and you don’t need to be hanging out with them anyway.

3.    Your friends will love you for who you are. True friendship is friends going to Perk Avenue to get coffee with you because you refuse to drink Folgers(not the best part of waking up). It’s loving you even when you break out in Mary Poppins or singing Phantom of the Opera with you even when neither of you can sing opera….Its seeing a princess movie with you even though they really don’t want to see it but they see it anyway because you really want to wear your tiara. It’s also telling you that you are being really stupid or that you need to relax.

4.    When no one else is there for you, God will always be there. Next time you’re struggling with something and want to vent to someone about it.  Try telling it to God. No worldly friend can ever give you peace or help you through your struggles like God can.

5.    It’s okay to be alone. I've struggled with accepting this more than anything, because I hate feeling alone. When you lose friends, and have no idea why, maybe it’s God telling you to be content with just Him first? It’s important that we are confident in who we are and who God is first. If we are not thriving to put God before everything else, then we are not thriving for the right things.

 I am not saying it’s not important to have friends. Not at all actually! Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 say’s that two are better than one! It also says that it is important to have friends to lift you up in your walk with God. So, it IS Biblical and important to have friends. What is NOT Biblical, is to change yourself in order to attract a certain type of friends or to let your “friends” interfere with your relationship with God.

       This is just something that God laid on my heart today. Honestly, I love when God burdens my heart to say something. Though it’s not always comfortable, I know that God is trying to use me in some way. I just have to obey His leading.

Until next time,

Tory B.